A Matter of Attraction

I looked at the interpretation of attraction and feelings and there seems to be four catagories.


1. NT's sensing and ethical elements are poorly developed, as I have mentioned before; these types don't choose to love; love is outside themselves and so it just happends. It's neither conscious nor is it subconscious. My mom's an INTp and she says, that for her, she is just there that she doesn't think about love, it's just there.

2. NF's feelings are conscious but their attraction is subconscious. They always know their feelings but can't figure out why they are attracted to something. They may find the strangest things to be beautiful and pleasing even when others have rejected them for their esthetic unpleasantness. For NF types love is in the heart, sprit, soul, and body...it is in entirety of all of the being.

ES's openly admit physical attraction.

3. ST's know when they are attracted; their attraction in conscious, but they can't control their feelings because they are not subject to conscious control - feelings exist independently of their logic ( their mind); feelings are in their heart.

4. SF's are aware of their feelings and of the feelings of other's. These feelings for them exist in their every cell; they can easily tell what and why they are attracted and what they are feeling in its every aspect.


Although ideally, I would love to live in a world where duals interacted more frequently and hence had greater opportunity to find love amongst one another, in our vast world this is not possible (except in the internet dating world). When it comes to love, yes, you have to be attracted and get that special feeling, but when it comes down to decision making, many people seem to be at a complete loss for what to do; this is where Socionics is important. In choosing a life long partner, one must realize that love is independent of feelings and should be independent of making important decisions; you may go through phases in a long term relationship where you love the person you are with but can't stand them and an instinct to flee sets in. These feelings go through stages and love is always there, so sticking it through, emotional times will bring feelings back and forth and all the way around. Dual relations require honesty and open communication, they are no exception to conscious involvement in the relationship by both halves of the whole.