I looked at the interpretation of attraction and feelings and there seems to be four catagories.
1. NT's sensing and ethical elements are poorly developed, as I have mentioned before; these types don't choose to love; love is outside themselves and so it just happends. It's neither conscious nor is it subconscious. My mom's an INTp and she says, that for her, she is just there that she doesn't think about love, it's just there.
2. NF's feelings are conscious but their attraction is subconscious. They always know their feelings but can't figure out why they are attracted to something. They may find the strangest things to be beautiful and pleasing even when others have rejected them for their esthetic unpleasantness. For NF types love is in the heart, sprit, soul, and body...it is in entirety of all of the being.
ES's openly admit physical attraction.
3. ST's know when they are attracted; their attraction in conscious, but they can't control their feelings because they are not subject to conscious control - feelings exist independently of their logic ( their mind); feelings are in their heart.
4. SF's are aware of their feelings and of the feelings of other's. These feelings for them exist in their every cell; they can easily tell what and why they are attracted and what they are feeling in its every aspect.
Although ideally, I would love to live in a world where duals interacted more frequently and hence had greater opportunity to find love amongst one another, in our vast world this is not possible (except in the internet dating world). When it comes to love, yes, you have to be attracted and get that special feeling, but when it comes down to decision making, many people seem to be at a complete loss for what to do; this is where Socionics is important. In choosing a life long partner, one must realize that love is independent of feelings and should be independent of making important decisions; you may go through phases in a long term relationship where you love the person you are with but can't stand them and an instinct to flee sets in. These feelings go through stages and love is always there, so sticking it through, emotional times will bring feelings back and forth and all the way around. Dual relations require honesty and open communication, they are no exception to conscious involvement in the relationship by both halves of the whole.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Dualizing by Maritsa Darmandzhyan
Dualizing is an interesting process. In order for dual pairs to merge and become one, all psychological restrictions must be removed. Psychological restrictions include emotional distance and closing up. Every dual pair will dualize differently.
Dualizing is an actual process...if a part of a motor is missing, for example, it will not work as it should.
We, whether we want to or not, have a piece of our motor missing. That piece is not in control of running us as a physical being (as in giving me life, air , lungs etc) it is a motor piece for a psychological well-being.
This psychological function serves different needs for different people, a mechanism of completing...this can be seen in task management...for example ask yourself this question...in a long term relationship, what tasks, simple everyday ones, would you like the other person to take care of?
If a person is not dualized they don't look like anything that their dual will want because they are in an unnatural state, physically and mentally. This is very observable.
Here's how I dualized with a dual...
An undualized ESTj can not spot his or her dual based on simple language, written or verbal. All people look and act pretty much the same (observe a line of individuals at the supermarket, for instance) It's foreign, unusual, they don't or can't understand why the person is not cooperating with them to answer their question...when he slows down or stops and when his dual speeds up and opens up then the process of dualizing between an ESTJ and INFj starts...the brain of the ESTj processes her words; INFj begins to speak confidently, not being afraid that she will be judged or pressured...she feels trusted and confident when otherwise she is reserved and untrusting.
One day, a friend of mine, who is LSE/ESTj, took an entire day to meditate and connect.
You can't dualize if you don't want to be around one another and speak to each other. It requires complete honestly and complete trust in one another. We started off with removing all inhibitions about our selves and who we were, being completely honest. We accepted one another, for how we looked, no matter how we viewed each other physically or mentally...we did not cast any judgments. For him, he had to get over that I didn't look physically glamorous to him and I had to get over that he wasn't ethical, which was a BIG deal to be because INTEGRITY is number one to me.
We asked and received. Duality is a whole, it is one unit and everything in it works as one. So one person wants to give, the other wants to receive. If you remove yourself from your dual you can’t offer what they want to receive, it won’t work. Ask the person to read your wants…I asked in my mind…I need food, I’m hungry…the other person concentrates and reads, or feels the want or need and then reacts.
Ask them to read your mind (what do I want, what do I need, what should we do, where are we going, how are we doing this, why, who, etc.) with as few words exchanged as possible, as often as possible for the mechanism, that connective psychological function to take over…soon that becomes automatic and you don’t have to try consciously. Because the psychological process of duals are subconscious wishes and desires, they can intuitively connect with what the other half desires.
Soon, you will be standing across the room from your dual and with a single glance or exchange the other person will automatically know what's going on and why, and they will act accordingly. I know dualizing is not easy to explain, it is more understanding that one is the other’s subconscious; conscious and subconscious functions in duals are reversed. Dualized duals have been able to read the thoughts and feelings of their dual; for instance, we sometimes wish or have the desire to be embraced, your dual wants to kiss you...you see how that works?
We are all preprogrammed for our dual, it’s society that messes us up, by teaching us all sorts of things that we hold true in spite of their uselessness to not only us but causes us to eventually wonder if the way we are makes any sense.
Dualizing is an actual process...if a part of a motor is missing, for example, it will not work as it should.
We, whether we want to or not, have a piece of our motor missing. That piece is not in control of running us as a physical being (as in giving me life, air , lungs etc) it is a motor piece for a psychological well-being.
This psychological function serves different needs for different people, a mechanism of completing...this can be seen in task management...for example ask yourself this question...in a long term relationship, what tasks, simple everyday ones, would you like the other person to take care of?
If a person is not dualized they don't look like anything that their dual will want because they are in an unnatural state, physically and mentally. This is very observable.
Here's how I dualized with a dual...
An undualized ESTj can not spot his or her dual based on simple language, written or verbal. All people look and act pretty much the same (observe a line of individuals at the supermarket, for instance) It's foreign, unusual, they don't or can't understand why the person is not cooperating with them to answer their question...when he slows down or stops and when his dual speeds up and opens up then the process of dualizing between an ESTJ and INFj starts...the brain of the ESTj processes her words; INFj begins to speak confidently, not being afraid that she will be judged or pressured...she feels trusted and confident when otherwise she is reserved and untrusting.
One day, a friend of mine, who is LSE/ESTj, took an entire day to meditate and connect.
You can't dualize if you don't want to be around one another and speak to each other. It requires complete honestly and complete trust in one another. We started off with removing all inhibitions about our selves and who we were, being completely honest. We accepted one another, for how we looked, no matter how we viewed each other physically or mentally...we did not cast any judgments. For him, he had to get over that I didn't look physically glamorous to him and I had to get over that he wasn't ethical, which was a BIG deal to be because INTEGRITY is number one to me.
We asked and received. Duality is a whole, it is one unit and everything in it works as one. So one person wants to give, the other wants to receive. If you remove yourself from your dual you can’t offer what they want to receive, it won’t work. Ask the person to read your wants…I asked in my mind…I need food, I’m hungry…the other person concentrates and reads, or feels the want or need and then reacts.
Ask them to read your mind (what do I want, what do I need, what should we do, where are we going, how are we doing this, why, who, etc.) with as few words exchanged as possible, as often as possible for the mechanism, that connective psychological function to take over…soon that becomes automatic and you don’t have to try consciously. Because the psychological process of duals are subconscious wishes and desires, they can intuitively connect with what the other half desires.
Soon, you will be standing across the room from your dual and with a single glance or exchange the other person will automatically know what's going on and why, and they will act accordingly. I know dualizing is not easy to explain, it is more understanding that one is the other’s subconscious; conscious and subconscious functions in duals are reversed. Dualized duals have been able to read the thoughts and feelings of their dual; for instance, we sometimes wish or have the desire to be embraced, your dual wants to kiss you...you see how that works?
We are all preprogrammed for our dual, it’s society that messes us up, by teaching us all sorts of things that we hold true in spite of their uselessness to not only us but causes us to eventually wonder if the way we are makes any sense.
Monday, February 22, 2010
ID TYPE Visual Identification by Rod Novichkov
Well VI is identifying people's type, there are 16. This method is identification without the use of a verbal test.
1. j and p type is observed in a side view picture of an individual; this has to do with how the spinal cord is attached to the base of the human brain.
2. The frontal lobe of the brain is shaped in two ways, flat or round; this translates into having a flat broad forehead with protruding superciliary arch for T types and round forehead for F types.
Wikipedia (Links)
Orbitofrontal_cortex
"It has even been proposed that the human OFC has a role in mediating subjective hedonic experience [1]." This is very much true of ESTj personality types..male and female.
3. Visual processing determines S or N types . N types have the ability to cross their eyes independent of one eye or the other to observe a wider periphery vision; S types are unable to do this function. Many ST's are able to observe everything in their field of vision at once; N doesn't work this way...they may look but not see.
4. The last element is E or I; this is behavioral and it's a little difficult to tell in a person but very observable in a photograph; an E type will be very focused at the camera and I type will seem rather removed, in their mind, melancholic. This is the hardest function to decipher but once you get good practice you will actually see that type of people look very much like one another. So you won't need to look at I or E any more...type will be very apparent.
1. j and p type is observed in a side view picture of an individual; this has to do with how the spinal cord is attached to the base of the human brain.
2. The frontal lobe of the brain is shaped in two ways, flat or round; this translates into having a flat broad forehead with protruding superciliary arch for T types and round forehead for F types.
Wikipedia (Links)
Orbitofrontal_cortex
"It has even been proposed that the human OFC has a role in mediating subjective hedonic experience [1]." This is very much true of ESTj personality types..male and female.
3. Visual processing determines S or N types . N types have the ability to cross their eyes independent of one eye or the other to observe a wider periphery vision; S types are unable to do this function. Many ST's are able to observe everything in their field of vision at once; N doesn't work this way...they may look but not see.
4. The last element is E or I; this is behavioral and it's a little difficult to tell in a person but very observable in a photograph; an E type will be very focused at the camera and I type will seem rather removed, in their mind, melancholic. This is the hardest function to decipher but once you get good practice you will actually see that type of people look very much like one another. So you won't need to look at I or E any more...type will be very apparent.
Visual Identification of INFJ / EII personality type
Just like myself, these celebrities are also INFJ / EII personality type; I have included side shots of them with clear indiction of their Rational orientation, which is one class of human beings. It is natural for Rationals to often have heads that slightly lean forward, when standing up, except for ESTj/LSEs who stick their chest out when walking or rather flex their back muscles back.
Mottos that I live my life by are kindness, love, generosity, wishing well, helping when I can, compassion, sympathy, empathy, and fighting for those less fortunate, towards all mankind, striving for a simple way of living out of respect and appreciation for the environment and forwarding all of these values to all other living creatures we inhabit the earth with. I believe these are the positive traits of an INFj/EII type. In Socionics, there is not good and bad type and every type does come with particular traits that they are not naturally geared towards; I believe that by learning each other's types we may find strength and inspiration in others that we don't have in our selves. EIIs, though humanist and compassionate, also have their set of weak traits that they confront, just like with all types. But, being a positivist, I'm more inclined to focus on the "good" parts of myself, so take that as you will.
INFj's are often capable of experiencing consuming emotions, they can appear consumed and distracted, this is also true to the way that Robin Wright Penn has described herself in interviews. Please read the life of Van Gogh and you will get a look at how this internal emotional state works http://cvc.csusb.edu/VincentVanGogh.htm.
If you are an INFj type and you are experiencing turbulent emotions please write to me, seek professional help, have friends around, and do not isolate yourself under any circumstance. You'll notice that there aren't as many male EII/INFj types.
INFJ / EII women:
Vanessa Paradis
Maria Shriver
Gisele Bundchen
Jane Fonda
Shannyn Sossamon
Robin Wright
Mackenzie Phillips
Maritsa Darmandzhyan (myself)
Michelle Obama
Holland Taylor
A pic of Holland Taylor showing off her type...
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3332086528/nm0852466
INFj/EII men:
Hayden Christensen
Guy Pearce
Scott Weiland
Mottos that I live my life by are kindness, love, generosity, wishing well, helping when I can, compassion, sympathy, empathy, and fighting for those less fortunate, towards all mankind, striving for a simple way of living out of respect and appreciation for the environment and forwarding all of these values to all other living creatures we inhabit the earth with. I believe these are the positive traits of an INFj/EII type. In Socionics, there is not good and bad type and every type does come with particular traits that they are not naturally geared towards; I believe that by learning each other's types we may find strength and inspiration in others that we don't have in our selves. EIIs, though humanist and compassionate, also have their set of weak traits that they confront, just like with all types. But, being a positivist, I'm more inclined to focus on the "good" parts of myself, so take that as you will.
INFj's are often capable of experiencing consuming emotions, they can appear consumed and distracted, this is also true to the way that Robin Wright Penn has described herself in interviews. Please read the life of Van Gogh and you will get a look at how this internal emotional state works http://cvc.csusb.edu/VincentVanGogh.htm.
The typical EII look is being wistful, enigmatic, and some will say they look distracted or their head in the clouds, although not as much as their perceptual look a likes, IEI, would look; their faces aren't very excessively animated because they internalize their
emotions, hence internal ethical types. EII empathize with how how others feel; they
feel that others should be able to tell how they feel as well; they don't feel like they
need to broadcast their emotions; the external quality and the way they look draws people to
get to know them. People are
intrigued, and want to find out more about them because of the enigmatic and mysterious quality.
If you are an INFj type and you are experiencing turbulent emotions please write to me, seek professional help, have friends around, and do not isolate yourself under any circumstance. You'll notice that there aren't as many male EII/INFj types.
INFJ / EII women:
Vanessa Paradis
Maria Shriver
Gisele Bundchen
Jane Fonda
Shannyn Sossamon
Robin Wright
Mackenzie Phillips
Maritsa Darmandzhyan (myself)
Michelle Obama
Holland Taylor
A pic of Holland Taylor showing off her type...
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3332086528/nm0852466
INFj/EII men:
Hayden Christensen
Guy Pearce
Scott Weiland
IM ( Information Metabolism ) Maritsa Darmandzhyan
A good understanding of Informational Metabolism (IM) will allow good understanding of Socionics; it is the building block that makes Socionics work. What IM does for Socionics is that it gives tools to recognizing which type a person is. If Socionics is the building, IM is the bricks, giving it structure and helping make sense of Socionics. There are 8 functions of IM called Information functions (IF). All human beings have access to these functions, but what determines their type is the one that has primacy. These are:
Extraverted Thinking (Te)
Introverted Thinking (Ti)
Extraverted Sensing (Se)
Introverted Sensing (Si)
Extraverted Feeling (Fe)
Introverted Feeling (Fi)
Extraverted Intuition (Ne)
Introverted Intuition (Ni)
You can't pick and choose a function base on what you prefer. Your dominant functions are inherent you can't say "I like this better, so I'm going to make this my dominant function and do it." Mistyping others is common in Socionics because behaviors are being interpreted trough their own filters. This is where Visual Identification is important, because it's not open to suggestive interpretation. A good example of a mistypable situation is when a person acts outside their typical element, by being strongly emotional at certain times and if caught in that moment, the typist may interpret that behavior to belong to one function over another.
Extraverted Thinking (Te)
Introverted Thinking (Ti)
Extraverted Sensing (Se)
Introverted Sensing (Si)
Extraverted Feeling (Fe)
Introverted Feeling (Fi)
Extraverted Intuition (Ne)
Introverted Intuition (Ni)
You can't pick and choose a function base on what you prefer. Your dominant functions are inherent you can't say "I like this better, so I'm going to make this my dominant function and do it." Mistyping others is common in Socionics because behaviors are being interpreted trough their own filters. This is where Visual Identification is important, because it's not open to suggestive interpretation. A good example of a mistypable situation is when a person acts outside their typical element, by being strongly emotional at certain times and if caught in that moment, the typist may interpret that behavior to belong to one function over another.
People who don't use Visual Identification will look for superficial symbols of what they consider to be type, such things as superficial mood/facial characteristics, certain attitudes displayed at certain times, which are all highly inaccurate methods of determining type. These inaccurate methods are often used by many Socionics Visual Identification sites.
We don't know why in the sequence of our genes we have such extreme markers that tie personality to morphology (the way we look), and this topic is subject to extensive study to learn where and how each human came from.
The reason why written tests fail at accuratly picking the person's type is that in one example a person may remain cool and aloof on the outside, but burn with all kinds of emotions on the inside, but every once in a while let one out and if you are typing with a subjective tool like behavioral observation and you don't catch the person in the element you are likely to think of them as any of the IM functional description.
Can you see the introverted functions of any person? How about the thoughts of of a certain individual? Don't forget that in Socionics a person who is of one type may seem like another and display characteristics of another, and vice-versa. You can tell by the way they live- LSE/ESTj live clutter free, neat, EFFICIENT, effective, maximize, organized, routines for things like preparing and cooking their food without the interuption of another person, while ESE/ESFJ like having people prepare the same food in the kitchen with them, want to look like they are efficient and buy many books to read on efficiency.
This goes back to the tree in the forest scenario. When a tree falls in the forest how do you know it made a sound?
Some IM elements are in the subconscious- you can miss a person's type very easily if you judge them based on their behavior and actions of the moment. If you are picking your type you choose the functions that look good; I know I like dark circles, you may mistype yourself and others in Socionics.
How about the descriptions that you want to look like behind every element; well, how about the ones your society or our society values as being "strong" or "desirable"?There is also the issue of elements that are more so developed in individuals with the same type or the issue of birth order (as psychologists like to assume that it makes a difference in a child's personality), or the environment and the way a person was raised that stunts or develops one element more then the others.
How about hormones and how a person's sex, race, nationality, traditions, socio-economic status, education, finance, and most importantly how is the person is effected by the relationships that surround him or her? and etc.
Once a type is a whole, IM elements disappear into the background. When a person reads description of types, they relate to most of them because we have behaviors of all types withing us and descriptions of type are not often written in the "language" (I will discuss type related language later) of the individual who is reading the descriptions.
Type says you are one more and that's the one you should focus on developing.VI is so accurate because type is connected to morphology (genes) and specific characteristics/traits, you will see when you are typed and read a good descriptions of your type that that really "clicks". So what can you see? You can see certain behaviors through your own personal filter, that may or may not mean much in terms of typing in Socionics.
We don't know why in the sequence of our genes we have such extreme markers that tie personality to morphology (the way we look), and this topic is subject to extensive study to learn where and how each human came from.
The reason why written tests fail at accuratly picking the person's type is that in one example a person may remain cool and aloof on the outside, but burn with all kinds of emotions on the inside, but every once in a while let one out and if you are typing with a subjective tool like behavioral observation and you don't catch the person in the element you are likely to think of them as any of the IM functional description.
Can you see the introverted functions of any person? How about the thoughts of of a certain individual? Don't forget that in Socionics a person who is of one type may seem like another and display characteristics of another, and vice-versa. You can tell by the way they live- LSE/ESTj live clutter free, neat, EFFICIENT, effective, maximize, organized, routines for things like preparing and cooking their food without the interuption of another person, while ESE/ESFJ like having people prepare the same food in the kitchen with them, want to look like they are efficient and buy many books to read on efficiency.
This goes back to the tree in the forest scenario. When a tree falls in the forest how do you know it made a sound?
Some IM elements are in the subconscious- you can miss a person's type very easily if you judge them based on their behavior and actions of the moment. If you are picking your type you choose the functions that look good; I know I like dark circles, you may mistype yourself and others in Socionics.
How about the descriptions that you want to look like behind every element; well, how about the ones your society or our society values as being "strong" or "desirable"?There is also the issue of elements that are more so developed in individuals with the same type or the issue of birth order (as psychologists like to assume that it makes a difference in a child's personality), or the environment and the way a person was raised that stunts or develops one element more then the others.
How about hormones and how a person's sex, race, nationality, traditions, socio-economic status, education, finance, and most importantly how is the person is effected by the relationships that surround him or her? and etc.
Once a type is a whole, IM elements disappear into the background. When a person reads description of types, they relate to most of them because we have behaviors of all types withing us and descriptions of type are not often written in the "language" (I will discuss type related language later) of the individual who is reading the descriptions.
Type says you are one more and that's the one you should focus on developing.VI is so accurate because type is connected to morphology (genes) and specific characteristics/traits, you will see when you are typed and read a good descriptions of your type that that really "clicks". So what can you see? You can see certain behaviors through your own personal filter, that may or may not mean much in terms of typing in Socionics.
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